Tahoe Triple: Marathon 1

I woke up from a shallow snooze to the sound of my alarm clock alerting me that it was 5:00 AM.  Every concern, emotion and trauma I have ever experienced and never released was currently residing in my abdomen.  I walked to the bathroom to find my bottle of Tums.  I made it 42 years without Tums and since my arrival in Lake Tahoe it had become an essential part of my survival.  Today was no exception.  Two Tums and a bottle of soda water to start. 

Once dressed, I headed to the kitchen to make sure my running pack, electrolytes and water were set.  I prepared peanut butter toast and water to attempt to eat what my stomach would allow. I do not recall having clear or coherent thoughts.  I can only recall the enormity of my anxiety.  Day one, marathon one, had arrived.  The numerous miles that I have trained both mentally and physically over the last year would be put to the test not once, not twice but three times. 

The night before, I had expressed my fears out loud to my dear friend, Jewel.  She held space for me and allowed me to speak my truth.  She then encouraged me to calculate how many marathons I had run since March, which was when I got serious about my goal to run the Tahoe Triple.  I had been filling in a running log for eight months which calculated total mileage.  I took the total mileage of 917 miles and divided that by 26.2 miles, which is the length of a marathon, to see how many marathons I had already completed.  35 marathons completed in the span of eight months.  I then divided the 35 marathons by three resulting in approximately 12.  This meant I had already completed the Tahoe Triple close to 12 times.  Jewel’s perspective allowed me to look at something that felt insurmountable and make it feel achievable.  Every time fear visited me I would remind myself fear was welcome to join me but fear was not allowed to stop me.  Fear would have to keep up with me for the entire three days, 26.2 miles a day, through tumultuous obstacles and for long durations.  I was well adept to all of these parameters  as I had trained my body and my mind to do not one Tahoe Triple but twelve in theory.  So fear and I left for the first marathon together but fear did not stop me. 

The Lakeside Marathon was the first of the three marathons which started in South Lake Tahoe at Lakeside Beach, California and ended in Sand Harbor at Incline Beach, Nevada.  The race was considered a boutique race with only 32 runners total.  Of the 32 runners only 12 of those runners were running the Tahoe Triple.  I arrived at approximately 6:00 AM.  It was cold and dark which required me to dress in layers and wear a headlamp for the first part of the run.  The runners milled around.  Each runner had their own unique warmup.  Some individuals seemed very focused and serious about their warmup while other individuals were very casual and unfazed about their warmup.  I was on the focused and serious side of the pack.   This being my first organized running event to participate in I felt awkward in the unfamiliar terrain.  Overall, the energy of the group was comfortable and relaxed.  So, I settled in quickly.  As 6:30 AM quickly approached runners lined up on the start line and waited for the countdown from ten to begin.  Once we hit one every headlamp went on and the group stayed tightly packed together shuffling along for the first mile which was relatively flat and bendy and led us onto Highway 50 to the hill of death.

Highway 50 is the main thoroughfare for entry and exit into Lake Tahoe.  It is a four lane highway with very little shoulder on either side and a speed limit of 65 miles per hour.  The race is run on the shoulder of the road facing traffic.  In some spots the shoulder is very narrow pinning you between highway traffic and a guardrail.  I had not anticipated the intensity that would be added to the race by running in the dark with a tiny headlamp on circumnavigating the lake on the interstate for twelve miles on a continuous incline from 6000 feet of elevation to 7000 feet of elevation for the first marathon.  I had no idea what I had signed up for.  There I was running by the light of my headlamp and the lights from vehicles that were heading toward me at high velocities.  At those speeds a distracted driver or a misstep on a runner’s end would be catastrophic.  I put my head down quite literally, focused on my consistent breathing and placing one foot in front of the other. 

I cannot recall running a longer hill in my lifetime.  This hill just kept on giving.  Twelve miles of steady incline.  Roughly four miles into the run the pack had started to disperse.  I was in the middle of the pack and holding a steady pace.  Some individuals decided to walk to save their legs and lungs.  While others found a more comfortable pace for the long road ahead.  A few runners did not choose mentally, but were forced physically as they leaned over the guard rail vomiting. 

I slowly started to pass individuals moving from the middle-of-the-pack toward the front-of-the-pack, one runner at a time.  As you pass a runner it is not as though you pass at high speeds.  You pass at a leisurely, sedated, unhurried pace with time to have a meet and greet.  One runner in particular stood out to me.  He was built like an ox.  Tall, thick and strong.  He looked out of place amongst the stereotypical gangly marathon runner.  He had on the fluorescent yellow tank top that only twelve runners would wear that weekend flagging him as one of the Tahoe Triple Runners.  As I started to approach him I could hear his heavy and labored breathing.  I had feelings of concern that this fella may not complete the Triple as he seemed to be struggling on the first day, on the first hill and in the first Marathon.  As I passed him on his right I said “Hello!”  He replied cheerfully with a brilliant British accent “Three days of running fun for us to look forward too!”  I replied “Yes, I look forward to seeing more of you throughout the weekend.  My name is Jesse.”  As I continued just in front of him he said “Cheers Jesse.  I am Frank.”  With that I continued to climb the hill steadily.  I payed close attention to my hydration and my fueling as I knew how important it was that I not deplete myself of calories, electrolytes and hydration or it could keep me from completing all three runs. 

Just before I reached the top of the never ending hill climb, I pulled out another packet of Huma gel.  As I squeezed the thick chia seed sludge into my mouth the mixture of my heavy breathing, the strain of the climb and the elevation gain my gag reflex was kicked into full throttle.  At the top of the climb headed into the second half of the marathon I dry heaved for a solid minute until I could regain my composure.  I was thankful to have the hill of death behind me and even more thankful there was not a photographer capturing the epic contortions of my face while dry heaving at the top of the hill.  

Once that unpleasant experience was behind me I headed toward the decent.  I have found the downhill easier on the lungs and mind but more difficult on the body and joints.  For this run my body was not over faced by the uphill or the downhill.  I stayed well hydrated and fueled.  I did not have serious moments of concern.  The second half of the run was very beautiful.  On my left the lake was extraordinary with varying shades of blue so clean and clear you could see the bottom of the lake.  On my right was dense forest made up of primarily pine trees stretching along the mountainside as far as the eye could see.  The combination of the elements of forest, mountains and water was illuminating a beautiful path for me as I began the transformation within me.  This transformation had been incrementally shifting for the last two years and this was the opportunity for me to shift my energy from the external expectations of the world to my own internal inspiration.  I no longer wanted to suppress my true nature and with each step that I ran my personal power grew while I shed layer upon layer releasing all that needed to be released into the Universe.  

Prior to the event, I was on a training run at home when a friend called.  With my headphones in I accepted the call while continuing the run.  She could hear my increased breathing and asked “why are you doing all of this running?  Are you running to get the monkey off of your back?”  The expression stuck with me as a very comical thought and visual although used to signify getting rid of a serious problem.  My monkey had incredible strength as it had been holding on since my childhood so the strength of my monkey was remarkable not to mention my monkey wore a backpack and was a collector.  Collecting unpleasantries throughout my life and holding onto them with ferocity.  I decided to name my monkey Schadenfreude.  Schadenfreude is a common emotion that delights in others misfortune.  It was time for me to get the monkey and his backpack off of my back.

Throughout the first run I felt connected as a unit.  My body was agreeing with the run, my mind was calm and quiet and my spirit was filled with gratitude and joy.  Numerous unpleasantries fell from my monkey’s backpack, but Schadenfreude and I barely noticed as the bag had been packed so full.  The load slightly diminished and I felt lighter crossing the finish line.  

I finished the first marathon in 4 hours and 11 minutes!  I was third place in the overall marathon and the top woman finisher in my age category.  To say I was elated would be an understatement.  I felt tired but by no means exhausted.  I was happy to be done but did not feel as though I could not go on.  A very successful race in my body, mind and spirit. 

Upon reflection of the run the first race was a successful race for my ego.  Feeling in flow for the run I patted myself on the back.  I do believe it is important to recognize our personal accomplishments and growth but from a humble peaceful state and not a boastful place.  I was feeling very superior in my run.  As though I was better than anyone other than being the best version of me.  My ego was on a high and I proudly posted on Facebook a humble brag.  I talked with family and friends about my experience with an overwhelming amount of confidence and pride.  I felt unstoppable heading into my second race the following morning…